normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
well hello there hangover. fancy meeting you here on this BRIGHT thursday morning.
I hope he doesn't find the chex mix when he takes my shirt off.
I apparently texted him "since you're taking time out to think about us. You probably need to think about me getting arrested right now."
the parents are super pissed...made eye contact with the mom while going down on another girl
Cuz its complicated and I hate complicated and I miss your penis
These shoes are way too nice for a walk of shame. Its how I keep myself in line.
I have just gotten home. I saw a lot of penis tonight. On a trampoline. Shit got weird.
We got a standing ovation as security was escorting us out of the ballpark, it was a proud moment
I just found my lube on the ground next to my bed. I would pay money to find out what the fuck happened that night.
I also know you puked in your shoe.
That would explain the note .... I apparently wrote myself an apology note from drunk to sober me .... saying "sorry for the fancy shoe soup" .... ugh I'll never drink again ...
So it's official...my sex life has improved since Pokemon came out...
The guy I blew who bought us all the shots last night? I really think he's the TV guy I'm watching give the local weather. Like right now.
and then you proceeded to throw soup at him for calling you a bitch...a CAN of soup...
His face will be in my vagina later so I'm willing to forgive.
Randomize
