8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
Nothing kills the mood more than a jesus song.
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
Just found out Brianna Frost the Pornstar goes to my school. Makes that $35,000 tuition that more valuable.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They ran out of vodka so we started doing Body Doritos.
My Grampa even called her out for being a cock block at the bar...it was that serious
Side note: I think I fell asleep holding a cereal box
It was one of those "wake up holding a random metal flower" kind of nights.
you were passed out so I asked you what my name was and you opened your eyes and yelled "ricotta cheese"
no way
that's when i decided you were gonna be okay
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She crossed her eyes and threw up into a glass while sitting at the bar. It was fifty shades of sketchy dude.
Wow! It's so great to hear from you! We all thought you perished in Winepocalypse 2012, man.
Do you want to go soon I'm overthinking life and my butthole again
I should probably eat a Plan B. Pill for breakfast. Happy Halloween.
I walk into the pharmacy and I'm like "I need three morning after pills" and the guy was like "uhhhh". All I said was "we didn't plan it, we all just got laid the same night"
So, do I need to remind you to keep it classy tonight?
No, because if you have to be reminded it isn't classy.
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