It's amazing how much jurassic park has contributed to my life recently
dude my grandmas the shit. she has a sixth grade education and got hit by a car when she was 18. she cant smell.
He was so confused why there was a string hanging out of my vagina.
Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No one even knew you were hurt until we saw the multiple cuts to prove it, and when we asked what happened all you could say was "I fell out"
Hah, I lost the lenses in my glasses, didn't event notice til this morning... How was the meeting?
No no I got the black eyes when I tried to do a flip off the second deck of a pontoon boat. Actually when I did a flip, it was a success.
I'll probably regret it tomorrow. But right now, accepting this $2000 credit card so that I can finance booty calls from across the united states sounds like a golden idea.
Road trip to buy me a baby zebra..are you in or are you in?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yea dude. I'm gonna be the life of the party. THIS BITCH GETS DRUNK BY HERSELF
you're usually drunk when you offer. there's one time you called me, told me not to dye my hair red, and asked if i wanted to see your tits.
It's whatever. I just want to see his dick again
'TWAS BUT A GLORIOUS SIGHT. BITCHES.
Just watched a middle age white woman scream WHY DON'T YOU GO FUCK YOURSELF, HELEN?! Helen seemed absolutely scandalized.
He fucks strippers and doesn’t have a life plan. Of course I’m going to regret this
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