Her little brother was home, so we had to hook up while playing hide and seek with him
Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
STOP SENDING ME DANCING JESUS FORWARDS.
CNN just did a special on how to do heroin safely.. I recorded it for us
i've decided to use this saturday afternoon to take care of my pube situation
I literally stabbed myself so I had a valid reason to get out of having sex with her
Its not even 10am and we are talking about what guys assholes we would finger.
I got a Luke Skywalker costume so I can go do battle with the homeless guy who plays the fiddle dressed as Darth Vader downtown.
Completely smashed, masturbating to the view of the ocean. Family vacations are more tolerable than I thought
The only pictures I have are of me being stoned or me looking like a man, which do you prefer?
look in the field by the highway and see if there is a high heel there. Or some Taco Bell bags.
eating on the run again ?
Jenn from HR called him the new office boy toy. I think I need to bathe in bleach.
We're too hungover to prance.
that awkward moment when you use blowjob jokes as a segue into coming out as bi
My penis is lonely
So is my ring finger
Randomize
