It has come to my attention that I should apologize for myself and my friends
I guess so. I don't really give a fuck. I think I'm going to jerk off really loudly tonight just to keep them on their toes
you told him to eat candy out of your ear instead of your vagina because you had your period. never. drink. AGAIN.
he told me that if i wanted to smoke he could make a piece out of my shoe. were keeking this kid around
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I know your texting costs money, but I'll pay for it if you consider this. Oversized frozen jello shots. I'll buy everything needed if you approve. Let me know
We listened to Rod Stewart Pandora and slow danced in the shower.
I NEED ANOTHER LEVEL OF CAPS TO EXPRESS TO YOU THE MAGNITUDE OF MY FADDEDNESS
I never turn down an adventure. My life is like a sexual Lord of the Rings.
He said I could stop sending ass pics now and just say hello. I'm not sure if that means he's no longer interested, or that he's a gentleman??
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just wanna be euthanized
Thas it
I can say with absolute certainty the only time we ever had a civil conversation was when we agreed we both liked pizza.
He made a group chat with him, his wife, & I. Is this really life!??
wait you like me?? for my personality??
I know I was surprised too
Honestly, you can’t tell the whole sorority he has a donkey dick and expect that no one would sleep with him after you broke up
Listen, I love you but you cannot refer to your dick as the holy sister anymore
Randomize