Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
Today let's steal peoples pets out of their backyards and leave ransom notes
So thats when I found out ur supposed to put the penut butter on your balls not your dogs balls, feels alot better
I'm outside your house...sorry I feel like I don't need formal invites anymore.
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I wanted to dispute a few 411 charges on my phone bill. The service rep told me I called them four times asking for Lady Gaga's number.
I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
You came in at two thirty, wearing your underwear and a tie then asked where you could find a sombrero and a pair of stilletos that would fit your men's size thirteen feet.
Ok. Cause im very serious about this. I wanna strip and do coke for a month
I did the crab walk everywhere because I was drunk enough that it was easier than standing up.
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Its raining shots and i keep catching them in my mouth like you with dicks shits crazy
time out. can we just pause the wholesome understanding friendship thing and be fuck buddies for a night?
we need a secret handshake
You told me I couldn't make out with you until I added you on LinkedIn
That's not fair! You can't come over after you just had sex and rub my dry spell in my face!
It's Friday the 13th and you just got boned by a guy named Jason....
we just ate hash browns in a nativity scene with baby jesus