if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
I've heard semen is good for your skin though, so that pimple on my chin should clear right up.
false alarm. still invincible.
Mars, I'm going to name my child horatio mars. He will hate me till he gets high. Then he'll understand
I know we had a good night last night because his turtle was half asleep chewing on the used condom.
I had sex with her because I didn't want to hurt her feelings.. You're the one who told me I should be more sensitive.
There are bud lights poping out of the zipper of my overnight bag and my dildo almost fell out in the elevator. not professional
One girl peed the bed, one lost her panties, another woke up on the piano, I have pink eye and door knobs are missing. This is why I stay in Nebraska
And im sorry for wishing your girlfriend gets genital warts.
I didn't plan on sleeping with him until he told me his mom is deaf.. Then I felt bad.
Last night I texted her to confirm she could start designing costumes for my show this week.
That is one convoluted booty call.
Yes ma'am.Im also looking at my collection of penis pictures in my email playing "who;s penis is that"?
We were escorted through the guys dorm by 5 kids with nerf guns and zelda shields. I felt like the president with a fucked up secret service squad.
He's doing his thing where I don't know if he's alive until three in the afternoon so idk
So do I get points for screwing my recently single ex boyfriend and then telling him to go fight for his ex back?
Randomize
