I wanted to tell him he wasn't actually in me, but my god, awkward?
it was a sick party until you insisted on putting on "that's how I beat shaq"
y-o-u-r-e = you are, y-o-u-r = your. you are a bag of douche not your bag of douche. if you're going to insult me at least do it in proper english. that is all.
I havent jerked off in so long, my dick literally prevented me from rolling over in my sleep this morning. new definition of painful?
i used the phrase horny rhinos in my paper. i hope my teacher appreciates the size of my balls
I wish orgasms lasted as long as the pain from rug burn
Please tell me I did not ask the bartender how big his dick was.
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
This is amazing. I can pinpoint the window in time that you lost all sanity.
Btw I don't have words to express my appreciation at how many times you've had to be on a dirty bar bathroom floor for me in the past two weeks
This is possibly the most humiliating moment of my life. I have diarrhea, in a port-a-potty, at the Renaissance Festival.
I think I accidentally invented a religion.
My lash glue is stronger than my sense of self respect
No, not if I told them not to. they listen to me. I have a vagina.
I have two bottles of emergency tequila stashed under my desk at work.
Randomize
