He wants to be 'in an open relationship'. Fuck that. That's the online equivalent of letting him pee in a circle around me.
omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
Fighting the police is like screwing a fat girl, if I'm drunk enough I'll do it
Can I get a DUI with a shopping cart? I've nearly hit 2 displays and little girl...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
if i find out your the one who pierced my belly button im going to fuck your sister again
I knew it was on when he was dancing on stage and I gave him a dollar so in return he ripped my tit out of my shirt and started sucking on it IN THE MIDDLE OF THE BAR.
attractive or not, he has more than one book on serial killers. i'm gonna get out of here while i can
I don't have to hold her hair back as she blows me but I do have to hold the ball on the Santa hat
If a girl called me a promiscuous philandering Casanova, should I say thank you?
Most definitely.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She must've been waiting down the street cause after I said I specialized in inner-thigh-face-massage it couldn't have been 2 minutes until she was on my couch.
YOUR TITS WERE ON THE TABLE.
Last thing I remember was a hand in the pants. Then I woke up next to a full beer and a McDouble, which I promptly had for breakfast.
I or someone else dumped a lot of glitter into my boobs last night.
Don't be upset because I bitch slapped you with intelligence
We were dancing and then he pointed to the club floor and there was money that I dropped everywhere. That was the nicest thing someone has ever done for me.
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