When we ran out of red solo cups we switched to Starbucks cups for beer pong... Who doesn't want to live in Seattle?
and unfortunately for you, hallmark doesnt make a "sorry i was getting a blowie in the backseat of your car while you were driving, projectiled my jizz onto your hand, and caused you to crash" card
Literally passed out while tubing... Boating while hammered is a blast but thank God for life jackets
having my hair in braids makes puking so easy. i am being an indian every halloween
Just 30 Funny Tumblr Posts About Starbucks
Note to self: do not take so many shots that you sit on the floor under the bar where nobody can see you, and reach out and grab peoples crotch.
Is tonight a drink a little and reminisce kinda night, or a drink everything and pray kinda night?
Fried chicken is a must. Do strippers eat fried chicken or should I plan on something else?
Escorted out of jimmy johns because I refused to leave with my dog. Stole a loaf of bread on the way out.
Turn on the Discovery Channel
Lets fuck to motorcycle gang fighting
18 People Are Kind Of A**holes But Also Completely Hilarious
I'm high. Everything has a 45° angle. That is as far as my eyes open
I just set a reminder on my phone to get star spangled hammered this weekend.
I just gave myself a sponge bath with your sock. I hope you don't mind.
He just walked in the house and decided to wake everyone up by yelling "I SHIT MYSELF!" We all thought he was joking....we were all wrong.
Ok thats it i need a list. Full names, nicknames, in which frats, with a photo, of all the guys youve hooked up with because three of the same guys is ridiculous
he drove over two hours to fuck me and came in 3 minutes. he got mad when I asked him if it was worth it...