She's a black belt cougar in the 6th degree.
I cant wait to get the disapproving look from this elderly black lady...
Is showing up wearing the condom a bit presumptus
there are way too many $1s in my wallet for last night to have been 'tame'
The family from the blindsided came and talked to us last night. The dad owns 68 taco bells. You would have been so inspired
God damn. I'm really starting to resent babies. They're everywhere. Like fucking land mines.
I got pulled into the conversation by "she sleeps with everybody" then "she" involved sleeping with "cocks the size of a viva burrito"
I am walking funny today. And it's sad because it's from the bad encounter with the sidewalk rather than a good encounter with a stripper
There will always be a place in my black heart for him because he gave me my first sex-induced orgasm. While you slept on the bunk above.
That guy was drunk and couldn't get it up so he just tried to scissor me.
If it makes you feel any better they literally are drinking alcohol out of a toilet. They are serving drinks out of a nasty ass toilet...!
I just kept hitting the drum to get thru the crowd to the bar. Surprisingly it worked
With my son watching me, I pulled down my pants and shit in her trash can.
Dashing through the vodka, in a tinder swiping rage, all the fuck boys get a no, laughing all the way.
This is a life or shit situation. Grab me toilet paper asap. This bathroom is fucking out. This is not a test. This an actual emergency and I am not joking.
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