kristin has been a bad kristin
My butt just had a miscarriage. It was yours. I'm sorry. You would have been a great sexually confused parent.
omg. don't know how to spell his name, but hot new zealand guy's dick is magic
It got kind of awkward when her dad brought home a 20 something asian girl at 3am
I just want to do a slip-and-slide into a giant pool of jello shots right now.
Just remember, if we get caught, you're deaf and I don't speak English.
Part of me really wants this picture, but the other part of me knows if he is really this drunk, he could be sodomizing a lamp and not know it
DRAW HIM A PICTURE OF SOME FUCING AWESOME THING. LIKE A UNICORN OR SOME SHIT. FANTASTIC.
I don't know if we can compare high school reunions anymore. The keg stands started before 7.
Our conversation concluded a weekly schedule of casual sex in between classes.
& I just realized there is no vomit smiley. There needs to be a vomit smiley
Awkward, walking to my bootycall's hotel room and run into my dad leaving his. Just nodded to each other and went on our ways
Hypothetically speaking how does one remove a lamp that they hypothetically superglued to the ceiling?
Acetone nail polish remover, and you lied about studying last night didn't you?
Oh definitely.
Well, thanks for not letting me sleep with anyone, but no thanks for telling everyone I have the clap.
Looking back, we probably shouldn't have chased alcohol with more alcohol
Randomize
