Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
my drunk step mom just informed me my dad likes reverse cowgirl. Please god kill me.
guess where i woke up this morning? If you guessed the hospital, you sir are correct.
Found a bar with a washer and dryer and they serve food. I never have to leave
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just walked past a woman in the bar stroking a mans crotch, yelling 'I made this. I made this happen.'
There's always one sober annoying person at a party. I hate responsible people. I just wanted to show everyone my nipples. There cute. She didn't have to stop me
The Russian stripper asked if I like foreign girls. I told her I absolutely fucking hate accents. Most awkward 7 minutes ever
Now I get the fucking shakes every time I hear I'm Sexy And I Know It. Thanks, Captain Morgan.
He sent me a limp picture of his penis with the caption " same ol, same ol' I cant believe these are the type of guys I sleep with
You went over didnt you?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How was the picnic?
We played softball, except our team sucked. In one hand was a mitt, the other a beer.
Why didn't you put them down?
No beer left behind.
I just finished a four mile round trip walk to CVS to buy shaving cream and lube. You're welcome.
I walked into my house with my pants inside out, no shoes and a limp. My mom asked me if I had fun but I passed out before I could reply...
Honestly I am too high to watch videos of you jerking off right now
Hey I didn't mean to come across like I was judging you about your liberal sexual choices. I would like details of your threesome if you need to talk about it!
april was a good month for me, sexually...doubled my number, had a threesome, fucked a girl for the first time and two different boys in one night. there should be a medal
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