I hate my date so much right now for even thinking I want to do the electric slide.
So many tools at one table, you'd enjoy my italian family
I'm on his itunes. He has a sex playlist. It's actually not so much a playlist as 12 Kylie Minogue songs with a big gay Whitney finish.
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
its likemy ribs anf my hesrt aew cuddlingn
Clusterfucked is a frowned upon word in work related emails
let's just say if he has a penis and he hypothetically needs to put it somewhere... i would take care of that for him.
Just did a drug deal on the toy aisle at walmart, Merry Christmas
Nope. If I'm going to drive an hour to fuck a teacher, it will NOT be missionary thats for damn sure.
Honestly bro, I can't look at girls you've banged. Its like looking herpes in the face.
We couldve played the bring a random boy to lunch game but i made him go home
I never forget a pussy, even blackout me gives me that memory.
Well I'm missing half a toenail if that's any indication of my night
CyberMonday=Bulk Condom Shopping For 2018
So I wore my ankle step-counter exercise thingy while I rode him. Don't fuck him- I only burned .2 pounds.
Randomize
