Pretty sure somebody just said 'I used to have a nipple'
that's awkward
There's a vagina buried somewhere in there.
it's like your virginity...sometimes you have to pretend like it's still there
In debating whether or not it's worth getting out of bed and walking 5 feet down the hallway to go to the bathroom before I puke
Just saw the hottest 4 garbage men ever. They should make a calendar
He kept spanking me and talking about biomedical science.
Aw, you fucked a pre-med? you're moving up in the world!
if youre pregnant and ruin my spring break i'll never forgive you.
Wish i knew who the f is sending me pics of asian newborns.
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
Thanks for bailing me out last night guys. it's bullshit that everbeering people at bars is illegal. bitches have no sense of adventure anymore
i know you're at the dentist, but this dick pic was too phenominal to wait and i deserve immediate tit compensation
I wish we knew morse code and could knock to each other through the wall
I just want to have beer shits in my own bathroom. Is that too much to ask for?
Why did you not tell me that video snapchats are a thing? This is a fucking game changer for my mobile sex life.
But I made it seem like I wasn't hungover at work, so that's a plus.
Randomize
