they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
the semester is winding down: time to procrastinate by googling cheap keg options
Does my status still say I suck cocks? I don't know how to change it
At my wifes high school reunion. Found out her nickname was 'Back Door Brooke'. EVERYONE is calling her that.
I just masturbated while eating dinner. Now who's the lazy one
Cats found the secret coke stash again
They owe us $80.
I wish they could condense everything I needed, nutritionally speaking, into mike and ikes
I love shooting for the middle. Those girls never wake up well.
We won't have time to talk.. I'll be rolling you a blunt and you'll be getting naked.
Do you remember peeing in the sink while I was throwing up?
No ma'am, I do not. I found a video of us trying to do a trust fall though. Emphasis on the trying.
I'm sorry you caught us fucking in your bathroom. If it makes you feel any better when I tried to put my pants back on I dropped them in the toilet.
I got myself off in the shower last night for the first time ever! I just looked like I was playing a game of twister.
I'm pretty sure that cute cop drove me home. Especially since I found his card in my purse.
The bartender remember my drink from last sat. I think we just became drocals...drunk. locals.
Randomize
