recess is on disney at 4 in the morning, insomnia has never been so rewarding
sex in a ball pit. and I thought ghandi did great things.
He had a cowboy hat I don't know where from and he was trying to lasso a snowman with a dog leash.
I've got to stop giving the gift of vagina for every occasion. I'm exhausted.
Nothing says "future AA member" like bonging 40's out of a plastic flamingo.
after you left he started opening his bottles by smashing the neck against the edge of the fireplace and pouring beer into his mouth. it was about the manliest thing ive ever seen. its probably how lumberjacks open their beers... if they didnt have their axes handy.
I got so stoned last night I thought I was in second grade again
I woke up still drunk to a beautiful tattooed columbian man making me pancakes. How's your memorial day?
U have successfully fucked my brains out. I just almost put deodorant on like chapstick
Just used my eyelash curler to open a bottle of cider...
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
If she "comes out" to me I guess I'll high five her. That's pretty much my response to everything these days.
She is dumping me if she doesn't get a ring by Valentines. So one more month of free sex and it will be back to the right hand.
He is obviously into the really short sex we have.
You made me promise I wouldnt let you play "fuck fuck goose" with a 40 year old ever again.
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