Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
she gave him a mild concussion from throwing him against the wall in an attempt to dance with him. gotta love monday nights at the sandbar.
i love that he's uncircumcised. it makes handjobs so much easier. it's the lazy susan of penises.
We have a hundred jello shots. Lines will be crossed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just had a brazillian performed by a hungarian named olga. Im pretty sure she was trying to rip out my soul. You owe me a million orgasms
Lets both be adults and never talk about last night again.
He gave me a beer, petted my head, and called me kiddo.
Everything was going well until he very loudly said that he wanted to cum on my fingernails.
When he's drowning in your chest and he muffles out the words 'I just want to live here' that's a compliment right?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I started the day with dreams of getting laid and ended it with the reality of eating Taco Bell in my bed with my dog.
What do I do with all this pork broth? I can't waste it.
CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG
You're at a grade school volley ball game with a yeti of tequila. You've passed extra
I'm driving to work hungover. I feel like I got hit by a train and then drank that train too.
That's why my boobs are so big, they're full of secrets.
I just fanned myself with my wet toothbrush to dry my mascara. Wtf
Randomize