Quoting wale wont save you from herpes
Dear yesterdays makeup, Thank you for always being there when I stay up late binge drinking on weeknights and am running late to work Friday morning. You're the best.
When she sits down, she uses her fat rolls like an arm rest.
We walked into the bar in The Flying V formation from The Mighty Ducks. We were ready.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just wished the taco bell drive thru guy a happy cinco de mayo. Who says arizonians hate mexicans?
It's like alcoholism for beginners at my kitchen table.
i leave for school in 3 days. if you want your annual goodbye blow job you should probably call me
I saw you eating fruit and doing shots off people passed out
I feel like our low point of the night was when we had to start chasing with ice cubes and wheat thins.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
and now i get to think about how i fulfill a gay man's harry potter fantasy. thanks for that
Well. Your father was, shall we say, privately surfing the Internet when he found a video of you and Kevin. This was on a very public website honey.
By the way, Kevin! OMG good catch honey!
You mistakenly try to piss in a cactus bush ONE TIME and are forever dubbed cactus ass
he had DANDRUFF in his PUBES. 0/10 would not blow again.
Bring shot glasses to the final. Don't ask questions.
one nice thing about being home: no walks of shame, just drives of shame
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