My farts woke her up so I pretended to be keep sleeping.
Apparently Chef Boyardee is the only guy I'm taking home tonight.
stuffed animals make me feel really maternal.
It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I made $300 today by selling pizza @ $4 a slice to nerds who refuse to leave the library. God I love finals time
Also, our mothers are placing bets on which of us will get pregnant first.
Shit, I may have left some acid in your bathroom last night. Has he been in there lately.
Believe it or not I'm actually not the only person sitting in the back of the train covered in glitter and drinking whiskey out of an arizona iced tea can. Small world.
I liked a picture of him with his pants around his ankles, if that doesn't say I'm into you, I don't know what does.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing like a false "my-dad-found-my-weed" alarm on Christmas day.
I fell on my face, puked, and had to be rocked to sleep in a hammock. I'd say Europe is a success
HE TALKS ABOUT HIS DICK IN THIRD PERSON ABORT MISSION ABORT FUCKING MISSION
Tacos and sex are way better than any anti depressant pill ever was. I think I made a medical discovery here.
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
i think she learned that just cuz half shots were easier, doesnt mean she can have triple as many.
Randomize