last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
you went around and groping mens pants to see "which was worthy" of you to go home with.
I just turned in a 4 page paper spelling absolute as "absolut" every single time. I'm an alcoholic
My professors need to stop cancelling class. Bad things happen when I have too much free time on my hands. Bad things.
No amount of marijuana is enough to justify blood on my ceiling
Woaahhhh there! We are JUST drunk fucking. Don't call me "baby".
im just gonna lie here and collect money in this whoppers bag while sprawled out on this bench and explain that its to buy weed for my hangover
PLEASE. I won't throw up on the floor this time. Or fuck in the bathroom. Or dance on the pool table. So PLEASE.
A guy in the dance floor is raising the roof with an axe in hand. I love Halloween.
Just gave my pregnant cat a safe sex talk. That high.
Just saw a man downtown with a cat just riding on his shoulder like a furry parrot. He may be homeless, but I think he's your soul mate.
Did you cry?
I don't think so. I definitely lost my cool though
Yeah i think jesus would lose his cool in that situation
I added a U.S. Senator on snapchat....casual.
The girl who comes up after me always strips to Lana Del Rey. I didn't think working in a strip club could be any more depressing.
I'm still trying to figure out who shit on the coffee table. I have confirmed beyond a reasonable doubt that it wasn't me.
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