That's intense
If it makes you feel better he went down on me when i had a yeast infection.
when i'm not drinking i'm making facebook events about drinking
I woke up and he had cut my bangs and put makeup on me.
I don't care how good they make you look, you've got to stop sleeping with gay guys.
Well then I realized I had a bigger problem when I woke up a long board.
Ignoring the crisis im in. Sitting in the front yard in a kiddie pool. Wearing arm floaties, fins and a snorkel. Waiting for a hot guy to walk by.
The whole movie was ruined when some chick started laughing with what you could tell was QUITE the mouthful. This of course made the guy laugh harder.
All that fucking tequilla made my head feel like it's inside of a body builder's asshole. He's doing squats.
I really shouldn't have to tell you to stop banging your lightsaber on everything while we are in college.
Dude, I can't even reach my asshole to wipe it. I have a lot more to be thankful for this Thanksgiving.
I can't help you there
too bad we didn't bet. my 38-1 tears would have made great lubrication for a blow job.
We got kicked out of yet another strip club because your mom wanted to "show these kiddies how it's done"
I just realized that Margarita Wednesdays are so much better now when followed by No Work Thursdays.
I really wish you were home bc youre the only friend I could ask to use an at home waxing kit on my vagina. I need you.
Unfortunately the rum ran out midway through our viewing and we had to suffer in silence for the rest of it.
Randomize
