He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
I need the number of a restaurant that delivers, has lock-picking abilities, and is okay with full frontal male nudity. Entirely too hungover to get out of bed.
Omg you had literally better be on fire, drowning, and being crucified all at the same time to be calling me at 7:30 in the goddamn morning.
I knew it was time to stop when you guys were playing a drinking game called "every three steps take a drink"
Carpeing THE FUCK out of that diem
We ended up debating which Food Network host would do best in porn.
Next time, please cut me off before I'm at the point of pooping in the bathtub again
I CAN ONLY BE THE BIRDIE ON YOUR SHOULDER WHO LEADS YOU INTO BAD DESCISIONS
He told me to take off work and bring a bathing suit. If this doesn't involve six flags hurricane harbor or sex in a hotel pool I'm going to be disappointed.
The stripper was dressed as the green lantern. Even for a geeky girls' bachelorette party it was lame ass.
This guy on tinder just told me that he wanted to tie me up and asked me what I thought. I told him I wanted tacos
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
Considering what happened last night and how horrible I feel, I look amazing
im on a boat
How did you get this number?
Randomize
