Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
You screamed 'pound me, you big thick stud.' I looked around for porn cameras.
Shut up. I did not.
I really wish I was making that up.
your transformation into a slut upon entering college is like a shakespearian tragedy
I'm so hungover, I actually considered rolling down the stairs to avoid walking.
I have a critically important question to ask.
Why does watermelon-flavoured candy exist?
I think you blew our chances when you yelled "YOU SLUTS COMING TO THE TITTIE BAR?" in their face
If you're going to outback I'll have to decline, I've slept with a large enough portion of their staff already.
After you verbally abused the McDonalds employee for not making your fries fast enough, the fact that you woke up on a random lawn does not surprise me.
The fuck-me-pumps were hot, the XL hoody kinda ruined it.
Alternately I could tell him western classical is just a series of events that had to happen for music to reach the point where Beyoncé was able to pen drunk in love, which is the pinnacle of humanity's artistic achievement thus far
Why were you twerking to, "The Wheels on the Bus"?
I think I just got suckerpunched by a 14-year-old.
Stay home. Ain't nothing out in these mean streets but plan b and regret
tonight...tonight im having sex in honor of you
You aaa... you ever forget to wipe your ass?
Randomize
