Nothing gets me like the O.C. theme song does.
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
Soo I have a handle of 100 proof captain, cupcakes, and nothing to get up for in the morning.. This blizzard is shaping up to be a great night.
apparently there was a flour fight and couch sex...
why didn't you tell me his penis tasted like oreos?
She texted her brother about how much she loved his hot tub. He responded three days later that he wasn't aware he owned a hot tub.
Anything that comes outta your cooch is bound to be breathtaking
That could use a little rephrasing
So I met my girlfriends dad last night. Or should I say I re-met that mall cop that had to tackle me.
& I just realized there is no vomit smiley. There needs to be a vomit smiley
Dick. I'll go round and break his windows. I've been watching Sons of Anarchy on Netflix.
" my drug dealer just stopped by and did an elmo impression for my 2 year old nephew."
I wish you could just Google "people I've had sex with" and they would all just come up
Considering all of my stomach contents ended up in my center console, I'm a bit peckish.
I can't say too many people would say watching their drunk best friends fuck in a hot tub is very normal.
I just puked into a clean basket of laundry.
Randomize
