nut hugger
The night began with "let go home early so we can study for my 9am final" and ended with "show me your boobs for a free pack of gum".My breasts are worth 14 sticks for a dollar.
I changed my mind about Tim Gunn. I like him now. Mostly because he said someone's dress looks like a gay t-rex. Or something.
weed, chlorine, and victory. my bed smells like i had sex with michael phelps.
I'm sorry. We set two Christmas trees on fire. Also the neighbor's yard. Also ours.
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
The birthday girl is bringing her own barf bucket, it is going to be a good weekend.
She just cut the six pack plastic up and screamed "save the dolphins"..she also threw away cans of tuna. I like this girl.
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
All three of them were helicoptering their dicks to persuade me to take my thong off
Found your counterpart from cali. Walked into the bar we were in with milk and a donut, ordered a beer and said anything his group wanted was on his tab....dangerous
If tits could talk, mine would be bragging
I just peed on a rich man's lawn fuck yeah America
If I got paid for every bad decision I've made I would be one rich bitch by now
So in my DUI class I had to write down 3 people I'd call if I needed to talk and why...they all want to meet you now...
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