i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
Its already bleeding so dont be alarmed after you bite it
ugh. people who use coupons make me wanna punch a baby.
I wrote a list of all my homework due in the next few weeks. I feel I've done enough for tonight.
Just got judged by the front desk clerk, 2 maids and a security guard at the Sheraton. I've decided to use this as a character building experience.
Also, did that cop draw hearts on everyone's hands last night?
My mom said she saw you at the bar last night and asked how you were. She said, you replied with, "Oh you know, just knocked up."
Figured I'd get right to the point
And I feel like pitchers of margaritas accidentally make it down your throat a lot.
I mean, the lady at the Mexican restaurant insisted. She said she would win a prize if she sold another pitcher before noon. And plus I got to wear a sombrero
Go big or go home. Or get a live in house boy you met 7 years ago and feel like you have unfullfilled potential. You know, the usual
I got high and had sex with reindeer antlers on. It was magical and animalistic. Tia the season.
I 100% barfed while bumping the DMX remix of reading rainbow
Girl. There is no more toilet paper. You should have seen the twerking I just did to shake the pee off.
Remember that time we were together? Yeah, I don't miss that.
The police officer that arrested me Friday night just bought me a shot
Sharted again. Stuck in traffic. Fuck
Randomize
