theyre doing shots to celebrate her boob jobs anniversary.
i just opened the overnight bag i packed at 2am last night. Apparently all i thought id need was a handful of quarters, mascara and one sock
So how many licks to the face does it take to get kicked out of the bar?
Im about to get a baby alligator stoned, what are you doing with your life?
Hot freshmen.....hot freshmen chicks everywhere
You say this every welcome week, bro.
What part of "he tried to put his dick in my ear" did you not understand??
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
I'm gonna make some noodles and go to bed. Hopefully I don't fall into the stove or something.
Just letting everyone know that I am still alive after last night. On a related note, this is the 15th "I'm not dead!" mass text I've sent. You've got to celebrate the little things.
Come get your sister, she's waving a shoe about and threatened to "teabag the Shit" out of the doorman because she can't check the shoe in.
Well sort of got busted by a cop while having sex outside, so your call
have you ever tried to puke in an automatic flushing toilet? impossible
Wearing panties to a party gives you a whole new perspective on life.
Tonight’s your last chance for a danger free blowjob.
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
Randomize
