you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
Just saw a girl that looks like Michelle Obama and Im strangely aroused by her. Does that make me a democrat?
At the bar. Guy comes up wearing a hollister shirt and says "lets blow this popsicle stand"
You fucking left with him didn't you?!
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
i havent thrown up in four monthes, im clearly not drinking enough
how do flat chested girls get laid?
He's a fan of Alicia Keys on Facebook. It doesn't NEED to say 'interested in men'.
A slipped finger up the butt isn't the end of the world
Power hour was a bad idea. It turned into power 4 hours, then power puke. Then power sleep till 3.
Just used my boobs as a ramp to guide ramen into my mouth.
my head hurts. i need an adult
and not like a cool parent adult. like a full fledged party pooper grandparent adult
I'm figuring, since someone shoved pizza crust in my ear last night, there might be some leftover pizza.
His dick's name has evolved from Sebastian to Big Daddy to Barbara Streisand to Barbara Walters. I think the transformation is finally complete.
He got punched in the face last night? By who? I’ll invite him to our formal. Seriously.
I didn't expect the hobit to have that much sexual tension.
Randomize
