I loved tuna sandwiches so much in grade school it was so embarrassing
Everyday all the kids would be like oh grosss whose eating tuunnaa
you kept telling everyone that you were the mayor of silverware town
Just did shots with my boss to warm up for our sales call to Childrens Hospital. I love startups.
My boogers are black from last night. So that's either from all the colored hairspray or inhaling all of the tragedy from the party...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Everyone is in jail. I'll see what i can do though
Dude they are all farmers and I'm pretty sure there's a prostitute here.
Well when you're drinking tequila mixed with water out of a steve Austin cup I really don't think acquiring a straw is your main priority
I got stoned in my snow covered car and pretended I was burried alive
This day sucks. I just wanna play ostrich and bury my head in your boobs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You would think the bank would reward me for getting my account down to 3 cents without overdrafting it.
If you magically turned into a tall white gay guy, ignore this message. If not, then I'm sure someone has your fb password.
I HAD TO TAKE A SHOT OF JAGER AND SOME REDBULL JUST TO SEE IF IT’LL MAKE MY MOUTH FEEL BETTER
No, Ethan, handcuffs and friendship bracelets are not "basically" the same thing.
Everyone needs to leave the house so I can use the good vibrator without being judged.
sometimes i forget what nice tits i have and then i spend a month brushing my teeth naked in the front of the bathroom mirror, and i remember.
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