How are you going to pay for strippers in Vegas when you were just begging for McDoubles?
there r dinosaurs outside my house i hear them
pretty sure those are just snow plows....go back to bed
you have no idea how wierd it is to get nudes while talking to grandma
someone was throwing condoms at us.
no, they just magically show up around you.
Come back. She's looking through naked pics of his exes on his phone and questioning him about them and I'm too drunk to walk away.
by the way- Brandy out of a doggy bowl was AMAZING
No. Mother. Fucking. Jello shots. Just no. I'm not falling into that trap again.
There is a chick wearing some guy's shirt wrapped around her waist as a skirt... She's flashing her panties to everyone as she sings karaoke. You need to get here.
I vote we get high and sneak off to McDonald's to get mcflurries.
YES. ALL MY YES.
I just want to nap and funnel a bottle of wine in a cute dress
I also just stashed a half dozen bobby pins in my bra.... So when you take it off later, consider yourself warned
I think I almost ran over some kid I went to high school with. Guilt factor: moderate to low.
I found a used condom and a hairbrush in my dryer this morning.
Hiring someone to do your laundry would be a good investment.
sam was dropping a deuce next to me. wrote me a note that said "glad we shared this experience." passed it under the wrong stall. the other guy picked it up. that's all I know so far.
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
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