I found the orange juice, it was hiding in the vodka...trickster.
im probably the most hungover person watchin icarly right now
he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
For the record it's 1026 and you told me I could leave you in the bathroom.
get back quick. that 17 year old who peed on your car wants to do shots.
I feel like I'm in an ocean of eels jacking me off
We were running down las vegas boulevard at 8:30 am with our beers cause we were late for our flight
She is currently expressing her joy for "bad to the bone" through interpretive dance...
He was twisted. Literally. It's like God took his dick with a pair of pliers and gave it a half twist to the left.
im dying and naked and this is what youre living with next year.
This is gonna be a long day for my vagina and I
You said you were going to start drinking less. Drinking 25 small airplane bottle shots do not count.
But I did discover that he's totally okay with going down on me while I eat taco bell so that's a plus, right?
We watched X-Files, ate pizza, and he played with my butt. It was a pretty standard Monday.
we have beer and we're watching the birds have sex in our yard.
Randomize
