I cut holes in my blanket and put my arms through it. It's the sleeveless "Bro Edition" Snuggie.
New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
i just woke up at 8pm naked in my bed, with a fresh haircut. I wonder what barber i went to.
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
i knew it was time to break up with him once he pulled out the Halo foreplay costumes
He was the drug dealer that jumped out of his car to get my number
I'm going to replace you with a friend who will be happy when I find a huge penis
The bar owner gave me permission to push people into the pool. I'm never going to leave Los Angeles
If I EVER wake up with two black eyes again you better come up with a better story than trying to see how many punches I could take.
Make the kitchen floor stop waving. Im trying to lay on it
Plan B, arranged marriage to a rich Indian, is rapidly becoming Plan A. Fuck Finals.
Please tell me you're not home alone watching Glitter.
Can you see in?
Ok, they now been on the roof for two days. I can see 4 cases of teecate and a carton of smokes. They are yelling at "fucking fall" and pissing off the roof.
I need thought I would ever have to use the phrase "Don't fart on that Calzone".. Thanks for that
The only good thing about being back at work is supply room boom boom with my office husband
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