No shame. Just smoked a bowl with a Norwegian. Feels like something to cross off a list.
I just had a flashback to last nights party, I'm pretty sure I told most of the people there that I post a masturbation schedule for an iCal download.
You were offering to spell people's name for a dollar.
Why not. Its my b-day, you're in town, I'm in town, bars are in town, and alcohol is in town. I don't see anything not good about those things.
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Its going to be drunk as shit/pirate themed. Im dressing as the former.
So is there some kind of punch card you and I get to use every time we fuck a chick with a cast?
Yeah we do. It needs to be like a good penis- long, substancial, and able to make people cry.
You forgot the part where I played Slip and Slide with my own puke and fucked up my knee.
You HAVE to stop telling me about the shit you do drunk. I can't be both your brother AND your gay friend.
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I don't think my professor is going to remember the Halloween party... or the fact that he made out with a priest.
Woke up with champagne in my hair and honey mustard on my hands. Strangely, I'm okau with this
I think I passed out drunk at my own jewelry party
At this point in job hunting, I'm willing to become a leather daddy if it means some sort of income.
You just kept mumbling about the carpet being covered in stains that looked like the face of God. Until you decided that they were closer in relation to Dumbledore.
They want a bedroom just for their cats. And you thought we were gay.
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