you turned on the Care Bears movie at 5am and kept screaming "I CARE"
It'd be like medium rare by now.
I love how we're talking about your vagina like it's a piece of meat.
But you wanna know what the sadest part is? I had to smoke on the way back home cause my mom would be suspicious if I wasn't high after I was supposedly hanging out with you.
listening to the two girls in the next stall finish a 40 and laugh at this guy they both fucked. they're calling him 'tulip dick'.
my roommate made out with a guy wearing a squirrel costume, equipped with a blow up tail. time to start harvesting nuts for the winter
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
Do u like your dick pics shot in hotdog or hamburger orientation?
Had sex in a cemetery last night during a thunderstorm. I feel like my goth points have skyrocketed
A gay guy went down on me in the club bathroom and then fixed my makeup for me
its gonna be a great night
Sneaking the vodka in was the easy part.. listening to medley of puking in the porta pottys was not
Yeah, I'm sure we have time for sex AND ihop.
OK, but next time I'd like to be present for our make-up sex.
I left my Bacardi and dignity in your freezer. Will come get it later.
Trust me, I’ve got a sixth sense about dicks that tells me if a guy knows how to fuck and it’s tingling. You need to prove me right!
I’m not going to bang him just to confirm your Dickth Sense
The Dickth Sense!!! I love it! It’ll be our first porno!
The dogs decided to play a new game called "Who Can Scream the Loudest?"
I won.
Randomize
