Did you ever notice that cashews look like fetuses?
her vagine was all disorganized.
I have a masturbator in my 5th grade class. the teacher told me ever since they caught him humping the desk in 2nd grade, they haven't been able to control him. he's even on medication but he will just do it in class
we fucked to don't stop believing. most epic sex EVER.
The world would have a new energy source if someone would just take a blacklight to the backseat of that slut's car
He is drunk texting me begging me not to tell my mom. Pretty sure he is about to offer me sexual favors for keeping my mouth shut. I love being the boss's daughter.
I chugged a beer while I was riding him and he told me it was the sexiest thing he has ever seen. this guy knows class when he sees it.
Leave the bottle at home cause either way I'm not taking another shot. You have no idea how long it took me to compose this text free of grammatical error.
Gold star for you, but I'm on my way and the soco is buckled in next to me. This is happening.
There is a 1000000% chance you'll be turned down if you try coming on to me while I watch Star Wars.
Just resonded to a booty call with "how much effort is required on my part?" I think I've finally reached the point of smoking too much pot
If I had a dollar for every straight boy that questioned their sexuality because of me, I would live a comfortable middle-class life.
the amount of 23-year-old guys who have seen me naked is starting to get a little worrying
My phone autocorrected "shhhhh" to "AHHHHHHHHH" and I feel like that says a lot about my life
All I can remember from last night was eating nutella and touching myself to Weird Science.
My boob job is like a master key that gets me in any door, any party and anyone’s pants! They’re magical!
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