Bigbird is at the bar Im at. whats her name
i can totally see doctors naming an STD after you
i popped this huge zit on her back while she was blowing me. it was like a disgusting metaphor for what happened 30 seconds later.
Halloween 2010: the NuvaRing girls. You're Thursday. We'll walk into the party chanting "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Everydaaay".
It's been a long time since I felt this bad on a Monday... and for that, I thank you.
i took it, then realized you live 3 ours away. but if you start driving now, im almost positive I'll still be hard
She was covered in mud grabbed my crotch and said see that handprint that means I called dibs
Dude. I legit missed class because I got too engrossed in the porn I was watching. Also I need to figure out how to get as flexible as these chicks. Some of the positions they do are outrageous.
My boob is missing a layer of skin
i think the realest test of our friendship is how hot your sister looks right now
And if you haven't kicked a pigeon you haven't started your morning right
how does that bad decision feel?
So I fell alseep while I was motorboating that girl last night infront of the entire party.
It’s a 10 inch dick! Of course I’m getting a Brazilian
I did not marry a roomba.
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