bella threw up all over the kitchen floor then looked at me, laughed, and walked away
isn't bella the cat???
that she is
The first sip always goes straight to my vagina.
there were no ball for pong so he bought cat toys..... they had bells in them
and then the other night his penis tricked us both into sex
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I made popcorn. Partly so the room doesn't smell like sex, and partly to apologize for the things you saw when you walked in...
I didn't know what to do with her so I just tied her to a bench.
He's carved the words "SLAM STATION" into his headboard...
you realize you insisted on them having a dance off to korean music to determine who takes you home?
I gave them the 'I used to fuck your son' discount.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well you fished my watch out of a possibly vomit filled toilet so I think we're bros now.
I feel like we have a good system here turning our sketchy decisions into great stories.
I'm not finished with being a sloppy white girl alcoholic. I didn't postpone having a husband and kids for sober weekends.
Sooooooo, maybe just fucked on a motorcycle.
Everyone needs to leave the house so I can use the good vibrator without being judged.
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
Randomize