he said i'm too pretty to suck penis
it was like eating out sand paper
He came on my face and told me I looked like a gingerbread house.
Did you know even strippers have to have GED's these days??
I was under the impression that I sent actual words. turns out it was a series of letters and question marks on a side note we still had sex
Yeah, all the sudden I heard a loud "ding" and realized I had been passed out on the dorm elevator for about an hour....
Like. There is beer on the other side of that door and 6 yards in. If he's not back in 20 minutes to let me in, I am using this tree as a battering ram.
all I wanna do is swim in an Olympic sized pool of Gatorade and tylenol.
i think you may have a shot to cock block in a moment. just saying.
Wake up an cock block please bc these are noises i dont ever want to hear again
I feel like it went downhill once I decided we should take $100 tequila shots.. oops lol
yeah that bottle of rum is only the second thing I want that kid to be pulling out of his pants
I'm naked on my couch and just ate a chip that was in my belly button.. my 20s have been weird.
Here when you come to your senses come back here and I'll fuck you back out of them.
You proposed a left ass cheek firmness contest and got a surprising number of contestants. Then you ruined it by groping someone who wasn't playing and awarding them first place.
I told him he had to put his dick inside of me at approx 1159 to ensure it was birthday sex. i was 19 when he entered me.. came out 20. winning.
Randomize
