quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
nothing makes up for a small, perpetually flaccid penis quite like a British accent
I just told the 2nd grade class leprechauns are the children of midgets.
whoever says they hate hangovers just doesnt know how to embrace them. i'm eating a mashed potato sandwich and watching grind.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It got to the point that I had to make flashcards with their name on the front and dick pics on the back.
For someone only wearing socks and a cast, I felt reallyy overdressed
I've never been to a "going away to jail" cookout. do we bring a present?
I seem to have forgotten that I am wearing a one piece bathing suit under my clothes
I'm just over here all sober hanging with two high people talking about how they're "free-spirited stallions."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently I'm not allowed to call at 3am anymore and ask to speak to all his siblings. I was just trying to get to know the family
So after my hot dog popped out of the bun and fell to the ground I tried to pick it back up and eat it. He had to kick it away from me to stop me from trying to pick it back up and eat it. I like him.
It was a simpler time. With fewer STDs.
Do you think showing up at his door with bourbon and chicken is too forward?
You know your Halloween costume is slutty when you have to shave your pubes to wear it.
and please, if you feel the urge to call me crying tomorrow night, do so. i will be home bored and sober.
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