so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
Just applied online. Cant stop hiccupping. May be drunk. Hope they liked my smiley faces.
He toold me that when we were younger I was his boner buddy.
brittany murphy hurts far more than michael jackson, patrick swayze, etc because i never masturbated to any of those other people
you kept screaming i cant feel my vagina, it kinda killed the mood.
Some girl in the stall next to me just yelled "fuck yes i started my period!" she came out of the stall and we high fived. who am i to judge? i do that every month.
It's just a condom. Most people would commend me for saying I was going to start using them, and you're acting like I'm going to try heroin.
Ya,, he does have virgin eyes. Thats a real thing you know...
I'm deep cleaning my room right now. Not sure if it actually needs it or if I'm just trying to symbolically cleanse myself of the last 24 hours.
You're the only true friend I have, if true friendship is based off who would be there for me at 4am during a boxed wine crisis.
I don't mean to insult you, but did you leave your training bra in my bedroom last night?
Apparently getting dressed is an all-day activity.
I think I'm a wingman for every guy who bangs a girl I scarred in highschool.
EW HE JUST SNAPPED ME A NUDE BUT HE CENSORED HIS DICK BY COLORING IT I DID NOT ASK FOR THIS
Dude in the stall next to me shitting and sobbing. Dude another stall over, "Come on bro, you gotta loosen up." This is why I don't shit in public.
Randomize
