No, I'm never going to get a job bc I don't know anything about public relations except that Chris Crocker wants everyone to leave Britney alone.
Dating my ex's drug dealer.. best. revenge. ever.
No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
I dated that bitch for 9 months and didnt get as much as a hand job. I met her sister last night for the first time and smashed that...twice
I respect that
you also choked him out with your legs on the kitchen floor..
The poor thing was so drunk they wheeled his motorcycle into the bar. I just dropped him off to pick it up. The best walk of shame ever.
hes supposed to be my fuck buddy. im not supposed to see him on his knees praying by my bed when i walk into my room.
Fuck going to see The Hunger Games tonight. The only thing I'm hungry for is some dick. Let's go to the bar.
She asked the bartender for "7 shots of something fruity" and long story short the bartender punched me in the face. Chivalry is stupid.
Of course i made out w him. He was painted green. You know of my secret longing for the Hulk.
OMG OMG OMG I just throwed up in his pillow case when he wentto start the sho wer, time to grab my bra and bounce!!!
Wow.
You smoked too much and passed out, didn't you?
You know me so well.
I just tried to dye my pubic hair teal for her
For someone who's supposed to be gay Greg is really good at seducing me into things I don't wanna do
Why do so many fanfic writers want to see hockey players get pregnant?
Randomize
