Do you think they could tell I was high on that conf call?
I'm still with the girl from last night. remember to call me conrad and that i work for PETA
I'm drunk and I'm watching it's Alwyas Sunny and eating candy. Even I am jealosu of my life
He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Today's lesson: while in the shower, one should choose between either drinking OR shaving. Not both.
I wish I could rewind to my 8th birthday instead. I wanna wake up, eat as much cake as I want, and have a Transformers birthday party without someone judging me.
I am stoned and listening to the Olympics music I downloaded on Saturday. Best 6 dollars I have ever spent.
Yeah man i woke up and only had a Jimmy John's wrapper covering myself..
You and the dog were competed for the water dish
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Captain and coke. And it's not drinking alone cuz i have a dog
I've never been so excited to have my ass in so much pain.
He's a Republican and an Ohio State fan idk how far this can go.
If I don't answer right away it's because I took an Adderall and the fridge needs cleaned.
dude, you ran into a window then asked ME what the fuck I was doing.
I know she’s pissed I fucked her husband, but I didn’t know he was married until after I blew him at Legoland
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