It was kinda weird being the boss
Did you feel like Tony Danza?
I don't make mistakes...just understandable bad choices.
she farted while i was going down on her. not doing that again
....ANDDD I just became confused during sexting and sent my mother a text describing a "porno-worthy cum shot."
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Just found 2 diff. colored pubes in my underwear..new record.
Tomorrow will not be complet unless someone eats me out. Just sayin
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
Is there a card that says "Sorry I got drunk at your Christmas party and tried to steal your monogrammed hand towels so that I could give you something nice for Christmas"?
I told him I had AIDS after he bit me. His dad cried. I think I just ruined the little guy's 3rd birthday, but he had in coming.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He is currently pregaming mini golf. MINI GOLF.
Doing the walk of shame and bringing my dad a newspaper en route. Favourite daughter status confirmed.
Apparently I pulled that girl's number while I was trying to insist my drivers license had enough money on it to cover the tab.
My orifices are off limits as long as you have that stache. Your call.
Like Is it appropriate to tell your boss you banged a guy in the back of a truck at a wedding? Probably not.
He must be a special kind of stupid to cheat on a women who works at a funeral home. Does he not understand you can get rid of dead bodies easier than most Americans?
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