the real housewives of new jersey finale is tonight. it makes me wish we had pot.
even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
It's always a relief to be able to look at some one, and remind yourself that there IS some one who gets laid less then yourself.
My cousin's wedding had personal beer funnels for each table and a drinking game against the bride and groom. im sorry for ever calling you white trash
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then we talked for a little and he asked my last name which since I have yet to get a fb request I'm 95% sure its for a restraining order
Please check on her. She announced that Thursday she'd open herself to any veteran so as to thank them for their service. "my services for your service" and left the bar with three numbers.
She somehow inhaled a tack last night, she's having surgery today.
listening to the two girls in the next stall finish a 40 and laugh at this guy they both fucked. they're calling him 'tulip dick'.
They all laughed at me when I bought that necklace from Life Alert. Who's laughing now?
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I have officially had sex in every room on my floor. Don't say I'm not an amazing RA.
My main goal for tomorrow night is to make it back into my own bed
My tuesday consisted of speaking to a federal agent for two hours and watching a roving band of gypsies jump over a fire until 2:30am
I vaguely remember losing my underwear to 2 chicks in a bathroom. That drunk.
I'm like the big dick whisperer.
Yo I'm lookin at the cows. They're just fucking docile things
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