you kept screaming i cant feel my vagina, it kinda killed the mood.
You told me to hold on because you had to barf like a dinosaur.
But i guess when you use blowjob as a verb you are entitled to some language allowances
open bar reception. dayglow. pray for me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Called my dealer in tears and we talked for an hour until I felt better. That's the way it should be.
it says 'tasty bitch' in sharpie on my tits...
17. The number of times my one night stand told me he loved me.
We kind of broke a table making out. So yes, I'd say it was successful.
My now ex hook up buddy realized I was hooking up with others when she saw my spotify sex playlist making appearances on fb. fml
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We started off talking about nice cuddling and you turned it into fucking with a Santa hat on...
Bitch are you kidding? 2016 is gonna be the year our pussies run for president
I almost accidentally threw him out a window during sex last night.
You are currently doing Harry Potter spells with the turkey-baster...
He looked so uninterested when the stripper was slapping him. Now his roommates are harassing me about how crazy our sex must be.
She won't let me meet her hot new boy toy just because she thinks it'll lead to us having a threesome. It's not fair. I thought we were friends...
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