Just bored and untired. I want to be in Austin. At college. Drinking someone elses alcohol. Am I asking too much of life?
dude sorry but u no that when a guys 'likes' ur pic on facebook it only means he was just jacking off to it.
someone should tell her that easter eggs aren't meant to be dildos.
I just woke up to pictures of every angle of his dick I'll ever need to see.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've never known a guy to fuck more random girls in the ass then Dom. His rectal kill ratio is at like 85%
He's like the Derek Jeter of Anal
My mouth feels like I've been chewing on leather and firecrackers for the past 3 days
I told you all we needed steroids to survive the tour de franzia, like the bikers. But nobody listened...
I started blowing him in North Dakota, and I finished the job in Minnesota. Oh, the places road head can take you.
Was he good-huge or like "what the fuck do i do with this"-huge
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Uhh dog found a condom. FYI its on the table by couch please dispose of it. No reply Necessary
If I die, let him know that his penis was the last penis I saw. And I'm happy about that.
So here's a brief summary of my weekend: last night I drank four glasses of Death Punch, grabbed the toaster, said "This is mine", put it in my pants and walked out the front door.
I love how encouraging you are, but I need you to stop me when the guy I'm going home with is a dead ringer for Nick Cage.
ok but bondage is pretty much my easy mode
Caitlin, you were laying in your bed feeding your dog ritz chips and singing a whole new world at 4am loud enough your neighbors came over an asked you to stop.
I love my life
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