I don't usually arrange sex via text message
I'm too stoned for this. I'm Canadian.
I woke up with my 26er down my pants and a peice of paper stuck to my forehead with gum that said "tell it to the greek goddess beside me"
There was a lot of him and a little penis
i love how cold weather makes identifying sluts easier. is it below freezing? is she wearing a tube top? she's easy.
5 out of the 6 of them cut their hands while trying to shot gun the beer, I had never seen balls attached to such patheticness
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
I have bruises on my ass from her spurs. God bless Texas.
The ultimate Father's Day bonding experience: Both getting bailed out of jail by mom for mooning some shithead cop.
Would it be inappropriate to trade Christmas cookies for sex?
Lol woke up with mangoes in bed with me
My vagina still hurts from yesterday. That's the last time I think riding a mop bucket is a good idea. Don't let me do that again
dude. I can hear the air.
Chaz got drunk and passed out so we superglued a kazoo to his mouth. Listening to him Panic when he woke up was fucking hilarious.
He may be a manwhore, but he’s a very well endowed manwhore
That’s an important feature when it comes to a manwhore
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