Is it a bad sign when i blow my nose && can smell vodka?
Sooo sorry about that. And crying. And comparing my life to a duck
You should've come out last night, I need someone to explain why the bartender tried to strangle me...
I FUCKING SERVED PEOPLE AND POURDED JUGS AND GOT FREE BEEEEEEEERERTERRY
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What has two arms, one testicle and no credit card debt? This guy.
Where are you?! I require drunk, males and possibly crying. Vomiting is optional and/or optimal as is karaoke.
I may not have eyeballs after all the drunk naked people having sex outside.
Did I get stoned on a sunday afternoon and speak to someone on the phone for an hour about cats and their behaviour? Glad you asked. And yes.
Probably TMI here but I just rubbed one out while listening to thunderstruck, almost ripped my dick off.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She has "Massive Shits" listed as a turn off. That's very specific and there's a story behind it I bet.
Sweet, got a date tomorrow night
My vagina is officially offended.
So who left their underwear on a lamppost in my aunt's backyard
I mean it's up to you where you want to sleep but I'm telling you you're going to hear us have sex no matter what room you're in.
Fair enough
You wouldn't happen to know why there's an inflatable monkey riding a mattress on my roof would you?
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
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