quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
This girl wants me to lick her pits
pits??
Yeah pits, I think I still go for it though
If there's ever a time when I've matured to the point that I don't want to look at camera-phone-titties, go ahead and bury me in a shallow grave by the railroad tracks.
you kept saying 'can i put my penis on the grill?' and it was all i could do to stop you. you're welcome, though
are we at that level where i can tell you your girlfriends tits looked really good yet?
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
and i fell asleep on top of a grilled cheese sandwich. not the best decision. but not the worst.
The idea of snorting emergen-c actually just crossed my mind.
You're lucky I'm tired or I'd take a pic of me mounting a reindeer yard decoration
My name will be tattooed on his ass by sunday.
He said he wanted to lick the breadcrumbs off my chest
You know you're an upperclassmen when you go to a party with no makeup, wet hair, weed socks, and no shoes, take a shot ski, then leave
he stopped mid makeout and said "can I pray for you?"
I just opened a beer with a child's toy at a 5 year olds birthday....can you look up the next AA meeting?!!
Yea he was still drunk. He wore a Toga to his job interview.
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